x

2000yr:

Seeing your main bitch in public while you with the side hoe

image

batreaux:

You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train 

rabioheab:

calling people on the phone is more stressful than open heart surgery 

cliffical:

i dont trust luke he got too tall too fast